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Tuesday, December 23, 2014

my Master

my Master is so sweet and kind and gentle. He probably let's me get away with too much, but i think it was because we were husband and wife before all of this. Before TTWD, we ran everything together, but the struggle for who was in charge was prevalent. He was raised to pretty much give women whatever they wanted and i was brought up to believe that women are often times better than men at doing things. Sometimes, this meant that during any struggle for power, i generally won. Not because i was more equipped to handle a situation, but because i was ruthless in getting my way and making it work for me because i really thought i could do it better...

As you can probably tell, that didn't really lead either of us to full happiness. We didn't really fight or argue, but we weren't fulfilling our purposes...

Last night, as we got ready for bed, Papa Bear started to play with me and i said that i was tired and we should probably rest up... (big date with  Beautiful today)... And He just said okay, disappointedly, and started to roll over. i immediately hopped up and asked what He wanted to do. He said i made a good point and He would let me sleep while He took care of Himself... i asked Him why He would let His slave sleep if He really wanted to have sex... He thought about it for a second and said He didn't want to damage me by playing with me too much... So sweet! How cute is that?! Damage me with too much sex and playtime... lol... Maybe He forgot for a second that i am a dirty little whore... ;-)

i assured Him that i would not get damaged and that i am His piece of property and He can use me  whenever He wants... and so He did, face fucking and anal sex, which are 2 of my favorites now. Sometimes, He still needs that assurance and encouragement... vanilla conditioning sucks... i know i am happier serving Him and having Him in charge, but sometimes, i think i do a lot around the house or i think that nothing is fair... i know that He is happier in charge, but sometimes, i think He worries that He is too demanding or that He doesn't do enough.

In reality, we both work together to get it all done. He charts the course and i help us adhere to it. If there was one thing i would change, it would be to take away those worries that i know float around in His brain so He could be free to command without feeling demanding or domineering as He is not either of those things.

i love You Daddy, i belong to You, i am all Yours :-)



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