Sadist?

The party was so fun, I'm glad we went... I am so happy that we could reconnect with some amazing friend we hadn't seen in a while. I had a fun time flogging the princess. It helps get a lot of frustration out... Which works really well for me. 

I feel like the princess may work as a stress relief tool for me, but we shall see... I know she wants a connection... Any connection... Anything more than being a fly on the wall... And I'm over here reaching for the best thought that I can feel from this moment...

So now, with her agreement, when she touches me, she gets a paddle. I have paddled her twice so far and it has been a release each time... I feel like I'm teaching her a lesson... One of mindfulness... One of awareness and knowing how your behaviors impact others. I hope she learns quickly... But at the same time, I also hope she takes a minute or makes some mistakes along the way... 

I really want to beat her, lol... I may be a sadist, lol... And when she complains of the pain, I get to tell her to watch what she's doing then, lol... I may be a bitch, lol... Feels good either way