Friday, April 1, 2022

Nom nom nom and other thoughts

My newest cum dispenser is working out nicely… still looking for the slave I want… yes, decidedly a slave… and a submissive one at that… not a bratty one… 

He texts me a good morning every day, which is one of my favorite things. I have learned that I have to feel important to the people I engage with and the fact that I am one of the first thoughts in your day is pretty fucking important… at least in my opinion. I message those most important to me in the morning, most of the time… I’m not always on point about it… like when I get straight to work cuz I was fucking a PapaBear before my shift and didn’t have time to send out messaging until that first break in my work schedule… yes, I am a responsible adult 95% of the time… 

Right now, I only get to see him once a week… but it’s kinda what our schedules will allow… man, scheduling is the biggest bitch… I am learning that scheduling is not my favorite because there are too many wonderful things to fill my time with… and how do I choose?!?! Thankfully, the people who have my days show up for their time… it hasn’t always been that way, but I’m learning about setting boundaries and minimizing the flakes so I can find the ones as committed as me to whatever the fuck it is we are doing…

Tuesday, March 1, 2022

Everything Eventually Ends

Is that over generalization? That title? I don’t know… my therapy is teaching me that I tend to over generalize and catastrophize life… but I mean, everything does end… 

I am learning to release and to be. I think I am done dating others for a while… I feel like my heart has been run through a shredder and I need a break for a bit. I want the peace that comes with the trust and security in my relationship with PapaBear… my Daddy, my Master, my Owner…


Wednesday, December 8, 2021

SFSF - Sunday Funday Spoiled Fox

This last Sunday, we had a play date with an amazing fox and then I got to suck a dick! When the fox got to our house, there was a flurry of energy as she set down her rope, said hi to the kiddos and the dogs, and got settled in. Then hugs and snacks and rope. When we got into the room, she poured out all the rope she had recently acquired from a friend (Thank you friend!!) and I took off my sarong and put on a pair of panties. I was able to bundle up all the new ropes as she decided what tie she wanted to practice. She had also brought some yellow plastic daffodils to potentially tie into the ropes. 

🐿 I absolutely loved those. I can do a bouquet of flowers, but I can’t keep them around for too long cuz them wilting away in front of me breaks my heart, lol… I’m not sure why, but because of that, I prefer plastic flowers that never die or plants that have their own fighting chance to exist… I usually don’t keep those alive, lol, but it’s just different somehow… 🐿 

Anyways… she then had me stretch as she chose what ropes she wanted to use on me. My body thoroughly enjoyed the stretching. My shoulders were a little tight due to some stupid fucking push-ups I did on Friday AND Saturday… but other than that, everything was pretty loose… we started out with a box tie and my arms settled into position behind my back. She worked her way down my legs and my arms started to complain…

I checked my fingertips and could move quickly and feel each touch. Nothing was tingling or going numb. This one spot on my right arm started to feel odd, so I told the fox and she shifted it quickly. Then, I rotated my forearms in the tie and tried to relax into it. She checked in cuz I was making lil noises… and asked if I needed her to remove the rope… I checked my fingertips again and stated that I did not want the rope removed yet and my arms just need to relax into it. I am safe. And she let me sit in it! She didn’t just get me out… and she continued working on my legs… 

As I stood there, feeling the ache in my shoulders, I was reminded to breathe through the tension. Breathe through the ache and the pain. Don’t be angry or sad or frustrated or overcome by the ache and the pain… just sit with it and feel it and breathe breathe breathe and then my arms relaxed and the rope started to slide down my elbows. She stood up and said she was going to fix that and offered to change the top in a way that would let my arms be free. I looked down to see wonderful stockings/ pants made of ropes and thought that sounded wonderful as my shoulders were feeling tired and sore in the stretch.

As she released this one piece of rope, everything started to fall and I was able to hold the bottom ties up while she unwound the remaining top. Once everything was unwound, I found two strings to hold onto that had previously held the harness in place between my legs. The fox started to work on tying a new top harness. I could feel how moist I was becoming as the rope being pulled along sent a vibration to where the top harness ran between my legs. So glad I wore panties as we have not agreed to me fluid bonding with her rope, lol. She asked if I liked it when she pulled fast or slow and all I could say was yes…I think I meant both… mmmmmm…. This, whatever this is… keep doing this…

And then the tie was finished up and I was laying on the bed in front of Daddy and showing off my ropes. He gave me a shooting star and it stung like a bitch! Then he tied her up in some electric rope and I laid on the floor as I watched them play… his face had the biggest fucking grin as he pulled out his silicone implements and touched her and the rope harness with it. She giggled so much, I was giggling… and usually I am scared the fuck around electric, cowering in a corner unless the wand is in my hand… just out of reflex… animal instinct… whatever… and so it was fun to see the electric this time. When you turn off the lights with the silicone flogger, you can see the sparks of electricity arcing and it is like little fireworks…

Then, it was time for aftercare, so I completely verified that the electric was turned off (by turning off the power strip, hi neurosis) and climbed onto the bed in a cuddle puddle. Daddy at the bottom, then the fox, then me… as soon as I leaned into her, I fell into cuddle vibes… and I felt like I could just lay there and cuddle and have my hair pet forever. And then she asked to braid my hair and I hopped up to get a brush. She put in a beautiful French braid and then we went back to cuddling… my tummy started to tell me it was food time, so I put my sarong on over the rope. 

When I came out to get the food, my kiddos complimented my rope pants. They know that I enjoy getting tied with rope and that it’s good for my soul. Once we were done having lunch, it was time for the ropes to come off. I love how she takes the rope off, conscious of the slide and feel of the rope as it unwraps my body, breaking out in goosebumps as the rope caresses my soft skin, making me tingle all over. I look at Daddy and he mouths I love you to me, so I mouth it back. 

We sit and bundle up rope. We chat and giggle and get everything ready to be put away. As she sits against the wall, I have the sudden urge to curl up next to her so she can pet or cuddle me again… so she can touch me again… mmmmm… and then it was time for her to go about her other Sunday activities. We walked her out and gave hugs.

Later that day, my tasty cook came by the house to drop off my food prep for the week.

🐿 I am really missing my girl as I usually get to cuddle and get rope from her on Saturdays and Sundays, but she has been ill. We have video chatted and kept in communication, but it’s not the same as sharing energy in person. 🐿

Anyways… after I got it put away in the fridge, I offered him a smoke and took him into my bathroom where I loaded a fresh bowl as he started to touch my tits. I took my sarong off and kissed him as his hands roamed my body. I looked down and his cock was out so I bent to my knees and started sucking. Then, my knees started bitching, so I grabbed my bj pillow out of the closet and kneeled on that, which was perfect! Thank goodness for bj pillows, lol. As I sucked his cock, I started to fall into a sort of dick sucking subby space and just wanted to keep sucking. Sliding in and out of my mouth, stiff and firm, my tongue slipping back and forth across that yummy underside… when he came, I swallowed 4 times and I wanted to keep going. I wanted more. Cock high/drunk af… 

I thanked him from my knees and stood up. Gave a hug. Brushed my teeth. And we chatted for a moment as he gained his wits and I enjoyed losing myself in his eyes, drunk in the moment… in the experience of this. I walked him out and then sat next Daddy who called me a dirty lil whore under his breath. I leaned in to kiss him and nodded my head so he would know I had already brushed my teeth and his dirty whore mouth was at least clean on the surface level, lol. We then cuddled on the couch and watched a couple of episodes of the Mandalorian. Sunday Funday!!!

Sunday, September 26, 2021

Rope Thoughts

The day is light and full of fun and magic. Darker clouds are hovering on this rainy day of fall… fall, something we all do from time to time… my heart, seeking asylum inside the hold of another as I fall again… controlled, safe, tangled in the strands of her making. Movement lost, feeling gained, hinges felt in rope at joints and angles. It’s all about the angles…

Her ability to see the path and the way the rope flows from her fingers is impossible… she weaves it around me, gripping my soul as the rub pulls goosebumps to the surface… makes me tingle and get excited for what’s to come… remembering her taste on my tongue and the pulse of her heart in my chest… pushing into the feeling of rope thoughts and ecstasy. She weaves a cage around my heart.

Caught

My head, swimming… drunk on rope… drunk on him… his eyes, pools pulling me in… lost in them… bright and shining… his rough hands, grabbing my body and feeling my skin… dirty old man… thinking of my dirty cum dumpster mouth… crushing hard and holding onto myself… gripping myself hard… taking this route will end in pain… the pain that will already be… not sure what to do… trying to catch myself… but then, his eyes caught me again. 

Sunday, August 8, 2021

Poly Delights

I love that she ties me… the rope flows out of her hands and onto my skin, tipsy from her touch and flying high in the energy wrapped around my body. The goosebumps and vibes create a sexual neediness that I can’t explain. I almost feel drunk or incapacitated in the best way, floaty and thirsty for more. I reach for her and she pulls me in.

I love how she holds me and how I melt into her arms and her chest in a way that makes me feel unnaturally safe… the safety of her embrace and that momma bear love is overwhelmingly positive for my soul. Being in her presence is like drinking a fine wine and simmering in the warm fuzzies. 

I love that he feeds me… it strangely turns me on that his hands cook the food that helps nourish my body for the week and those same hands are so soft on my skin. Touching… touching everywhere… grabbing my tits, grabbing my ass, rubbing my legs… rubbing the crotch of my very short jean shorts while I feast on his cock… feast on it are the right words… 

I love that he feeds my mouth and fucks my mouth and both things are a different type of ecstasy for me. That my joy is something I get to follow and that I can be slutty and joyful at the same time. I am so grateful that I get to flow in this experience and truly be turned on by a few of my kinks within my various relationships… 

Poly is definitely for me… Thank You to all my loves…

Saturday, July 31, 2021

Thank You Master

 “Say ‘Thank You, Master’”

“Thank You, Master,” I whisper as his cock grazes against the pucker of my soft, tight asshole.

“God, you’re so soft, my little doll…”

“Thank You, Master,” I groan into the bed as his cock slides in a little… “Is that Your home, Master?”

He chuckles. “That’s the door to My Home… now be a good little anal slut for me, doll. Be my slutty little anal fuckdoll…”

“Yes, Master.” I relax and breathe as his spit slicked cock slides slowly into the open door that has become my asshole. I sigh and lean in as he groans and thrusts his hips. He fucks me in a soft and slow motion, working his way in. Suddenly, my body starts to vibrate as an orgasm starts to erupt within and before I know it, I am cumming hard. 

“Thank You, Master.”

“Yes!” He growls as he continues to ram his hard cock into my now gaping asshole. I can feel my ass grip and release his cock, trying to milk him as he continues to thrust. His cock sliding in and out is hitting the right spot with the right rhythm and my body starts to cum again. This time, the anal orgasm rips through and my asshole clenches around his cock. 

“Thank You, Master.”

I’m sure he says something back, but I’m too far away to hear. The world is dark and soft and safe. The motion is flowing and we are no longer two separate beings, but one connected sexual energy. My body relaxes and opens to his rhythm and our bodies cum in unison. His body shuddering as mine softens to accept all of him.