I find myself again wanting to write a diatribe on my extreme need for honesty. I'm tired of it, lol, and it is something I wish I could change about myself... but alas, I cannot... sigh... even though it really sucks for me sometimes. As I have become more integrated, I am finding that I rigidly hold to the most extreme definition of honesty to the point where it completely turns me off when it isn't followed because it impacts my feeling of safety...
Don't tell me you have done something I've suggested when you haven't. I give no fucks if you follow my advice, although if you never follow my advice, I eventually stop giving it... and as an Aquarius, my advice could change your life... so listen, or don't, but don't fucking tell me you did something you didn't do...
...or do and prepare yourself for an aggressive direct lecture in no one's favorite tone about truth and honesty and crossing boundaries.
I have learned that even joking around and hiding information in the joke crosses the line. Telling me we are having fish for dinner when you pick me from the airport so I can be a little upset because I hate fish to then offer to take me out as a fun surprise when there was no fish at home and the plan was to take me out in the first place is so cringe for me... just tell me you're taking me out. Don't manipulate me with your words in any way, please... the "surprise" is not worth the loss of trust...
...or do and see how fast I lose interest in playing with you. Those kinds of games are not fun for me, so why would I want it to be fun for you?
I'll probably add this to my fet profile after I open that back up (waiting for 2028 and the new presidency) to go along with my other writings on my boundaries...
