So it has been a minute since I have written a blog entry about my life and what has been going on... I am finally starting to get over the agitation I have toward the princess... Is she my ideal candidate for the poly lifestyle that I originally had planned with my Master? No... but as His slave, I have decided to accept His decision to add her to the household and stfu... I gave my undying loyalty to Him and will follow Him to the ends of the earth... so if He says she is the right one for the life He wants, then I just need to go with the flow and make sure He is happy.
I asked Him how I was doing at accepting her in and being the slave He knows I can be and He said that He was pleased... Then, He asked me how I was feeling about it and I requested that He not ask as feelings aren't really pertinent to the decision to follow Him on this matter... I personally am not feeling.. Fuck feelings... I have shut down my feelings to return to myself... the woman who gave no fucks about herself or her wants or her needs and who cared only for her Master, as He has made sure to meet those wants and needs as I earn the right to more... His lil chameleon fox who becomes anything He wants me to be... As long as I belong only to Him, I will not suffer unless He deems it necessary for me to do so... at which point, I will graciously accept such suffering.
It is important to me that I continue to follow His lead and give Him the best experience in life that I can as He is doing the same for me... I am thoroughly enjoying the housewife/ stay-at-home mom that I get to be now!! (Thank You Master!!)
In my quest to find myself, I lost sight of my own personal vision and mission and took on a more business focused mindset... as I get back to myself, I noticed that independence and what I want out of life do not go hand in hand... I love depending on my strong sexy Master to provide for and take care of me... I love being told what to do... I am a shameless and dirty girl who needs the control that my Master Daddy offers.
On a side note, my daydreaming is coming back... it was something I hadn't realized that I had lost or been missing... This morning, I watched Secretary (great kink movie if you haven't watched it yet) and was able to fantasize about Daddy having His own office for His architectural work while I worked as His secretary and gave Him BJs under the desk... it was pretty hot, so I used my vibrator on my clit and orgasmed to thoughts of myself naked and in chains, delivering coffee to my Master...
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