Good enough?

So... as you know, Master has been sick... this illness seems to be lasting forever and i am trying really hard to be good and obedient, but nothing i do seems to be good enough. i am not obedient enough. i do not listen when He starts talking about His day. i am not supportive enough. The list goes on.

i have always struggled with ttwd because it can be really hard to turn off the dominant side i must display at work once i get home. i happen to be more profitable than He is when it comes to the workforce because i have more of a drive to get stuff done and make something of myself. It is nice having him at home to take care of the kids so i don't worry about them when i am at work. In the work arena, He has always been one to settle into a position and be happy with it.

Just saying that makes me wonder if He just settled into this position as my Master because it was the pathway of least resistance... Then i remember the joy on his face when he punishes me for my insolence or the peacefulness he has when i have managed to shut down my attitude and just serve Him. In those moments, i know that we don't do ttwd because i wanted it but because we both needed it and we both thrive within the boundaries He sets for me and for us...