Tuesday, November 10, 2015

Playing hooky

So, i stayed home from work today with Daddy. i just felt that today was a day to reconnect... Spend time together, just us two, with kids at school and daycare... i was right... We needed it...

In focusing on my happiness, i am increasing communication with my Daddy... For those who know me, you are probably thinking, what? How can i increase communication? i am probably the most talkative person anyone knows... But really, i talk about a lot, just not myself and my feelings... Especially when i think those feelings would make someone else feel horrible... The feelings i have that could upset someone else get locked away unless they serve a logical purpose... Until now...

So i told Daddy that i wanted a day for us and He gave it to me. He took me to a movie that was funny but sad. Then we went to my favorite burger place and He ordered me this amazing burger that i would not have ordered for myself as i am still trying to flatten my tummy, lol... And it was delicious as all get out...

When we got home, He had me dress up in my red school girl outfit and then we played with two knives... One that we had played with before and another one that He had not messed with because it is the real deal... A sharpened Buck knife... He told me not to move and used it blade side down on my face, chest, and arms... i felt safe, yet daring and overly excited...

It felt like my face was opening as He drew the blade down my left cheek, but He did not leave a single scratch... The amount of control He had over me and over the knife was intoxicating and i remembered why i gave myself to Him as a slave 6 and a half years ago... Why our love has always worked for us... What i, myself, was looking for... We lost it in the most difficult times in our lives... But i can see the glimmer of hope that we can get that back and even better... We have made mistakes, sure... But that's life... And we are fucking living it, hahaha...

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